To be alive
To have people in my life that care so much
For my new friend who was at deaths door and now has a liver
For my pops
For Suzy
To be gaining weight
To the Buddha the Darma and to the holy community
My family
Farr 10 battalion.
Thursday, November 26, 2015
Wednesday, November 25, 2015
Dr Bruce Banner and the dyed CT scan.
"Contrast given through an IV may cause a slight burning feeling, a
metallic taste in the mouth, and a warm flushing of the body. These
sensations are normal and usually go away within a few seconds."https://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/003330.htm
Ha Ha....yeah right.
Okay so it's 12am in the Beth Israel Rosenberg building on the 25th. Cats; technicians and Doctors are spent and they keep getting orders for this test...that test. Richard takes me down to the radiology. He's has the same birthday but he's a year older and he rubs it in my face cause he looks good for 41...soon 42. " Island fruits man" he says I made a comment about a large dude down the hallway walking they way large fat man walk. " That's M. , he keeps telling me he's going to lose weight; but he just gains more weight. He eat everything he sees!" Laughing we roll up to the CT scan line up...few people in front of me. Some kooks. Two women behind me discuss Property size as compared to location to the city. Older woman got a new whirlpool with her husband recently.
Now I got a brand new, right off the lot IV for this procedure by a woman I consider to be a master of her craft. So it should be good to go...i.e. no pain.
My turn, nobody briefs me. I lay down on a sliding bed similar to an MRI scan. They techs hook in the IV and start Juicing me with Saline...really pain full if it's fast. "Fuckin' ow!"
' That's how fast the contrast dye is going to be sir' still juicing me
" yeah just a little warning please"
'okay' said as if I'm being belligerent.
So they roll me into the machine and say the first shots are with out dye. You have to hold your breath while they take the images.
Next ' we're going to flush with saline sir then we'll use contrast. You'll feel a burning sensation.'
Burning?!
Then they start juicing me...painful...slowly something very toxic is in my system. This burning starts in the rectum and quickly enrages my body with a hot lave sensation.
{machine voice} 'HOLD YOUR BREATHE............................BREATHE'
This happens for five minutes....and let me tell you it is not easy to hold your breath when you're going beserker.
Ha Ha....yeah right.
Okay so it's 12am in the Beth Israel Rosenberg building on the 25th. Cats; technicians and Doctors are spent and they keep getting orders for this test...that test. Richard takes me down to the radiology. He's has the same birthday but he's a year older and he rubs it in my face cause he looks good for 41...soon 42. " Island fruits man" he says I made a comment about a large dude down the hallway walking they way large fat man walk. " That's M. , he keeps telling me he's going to lose weight; but he just gains more weight. He eat everything he sees!" Laughing we roll up to the CT scan line up...few people in front of me. Some kooks. Two women behind me discuss Property size as compared to location to the city. Older woman got a new whirlpool with her husband recently.
Now I got a brand new, right off the lot IV for this procedure by a woman I consider to be a master of her craft. So it should be good to go...i.e. no pain.
My turn, nobody briefs me. I lay down on a sliding bed similar to an MRI scan. They techs hook in the IV and start Juicing me with Saline...really pain full if it's fast. "Fuckin' ow!"
' That's how fast the contrast dye is going to be sir' still juicing me
" yeah just a little warning please"
'okay' said as if I'm being belligerent.
So they roll me into the machine and say the first shots are with out dye. You have to hold your breath while they take the images.
Next ' we're going to flush with saline sir then we'll use contrast. You'll feel a burning sensation.'
Burning?!
Then they start juicing me...painful...slowly something very toxic is in my system. This burning starts in the rectum and quickly enrages my body with a hot lave sensation.
{machine voice} 'HOLD YOUR BREATHE............................BREATHE'
This happens for five minutes....and let me tell you it is not easy to hold your breath when you're going beserker.
Tubes part two
Hanging with the urologist went well- though the strapping young lad made comment on my stretched out bladder walls. Psst!
I checked in at Farr 10 at 6pm on the 18th to get a feeding tube put in me. My body weight was down to 98 lbs at one point last two weeks ago. Scary when you're taking a shower. This tube will pump 2K calories into me everyday...and help me get back on track for a liver transplant. They tell me that will happen in the morning. Fine. At Beth Israel, blood is taken around 5am so the Docs can assess any problems , hopefully before they begin.
The Doctors come in the next morning , 19th and tell me that it looks like there is some bleeding in the lower intestine...due to blood not being able to properly flow through the liver there is a pressure created. I believe it was decided that they were going to investigate with a camara and if it didn't look like a big deal then they would put in the tube after since I'd be knocked out. I wake up and there is a tube in my nose...guess it wasn't a big deal. They start me at 20ml an hour (I think that's the rate) of nutrint goodness. An hour later I start getting crazy heartburn which is never a good sign. But I'm hoping that it's just gas from force feeding. I sit up and try to burp and puke up 3/4 cup of bloody vomit. Wowie! So the doctor's are thinking that bleed is more signifgent they they thought...so how to they go about about dealing with this. Two hours go by and the think tank's wheels are spinning....and I'm getting that crazy heartburn feeling. Widline, my PCT that day ...can't take the state of my bed and want's to clean it...change the sheets ..et cetera. So I sit down in a chair with a basin in case this turns out to be vomit again. Sure enough a quart of bloody vomit comes out into the basin. It's kind of surreal sitting with a basin of blood surrounded by medical professionals. At the same time I felt like the dog who peed on the rug.
It's decided that I need a TIPS A.S.A.P. :
"A TIPS procedure involves creating a pathway through the liver that connects the portal vein (the vein that carries blood from the digestive organs to the liver) to a hepatic vein (one of three veins that carry blood from the liver to the heart)."
I checked in at Farr 10 at 6pm on the 18th to get a feeding tube put in me. My body weight was down to 98 lbs at one point last two weeks ago. Scary when you're taking a shower. This tube will pump 2K calories into me everyday...and help me get back on track for a liver transplant. They tell me that will happen in the morning. Fine. At Beth Israel, blood is taken around 5am so the Docs can assess any problems , hopefully before they begin.
The Doctors come in the next morning , 19th and tell me that it looks like there is some bleeding in the lower intestine...due to blood not being able to properly flow through the liver there is a pressure created. I believe it was decided that they were going to investigate with a camara and if it didn't look like a big deal then they would put in the tube after since I'd be knocked out. I wake up and there is a tube in my nose...guess it wasn't a big deal. They start me at 20ml an hour (I think that's the rate) of nutrint goodness. An hour later I start getting crazy heartburn which is never a good sign. But I'm hoping that it's just gas from force feeding. I sit up and try to burp and puke up 3/4 cup of bloody vomit. Wowie! So the doctor's are thinking that bleed is more signifgent they they thought...so how to they go about about dealing with this. Two hours go by and the think tank's wheels are spinning....and I'm getting that crazy heartburn feeling. Widline, my PCT that day ...can't take the state of my bed and want's to clean it...change the sheets ..et cetera. So I sit down in a chair with a basin in case this turns out to be vomit again. Sure enough a quart of bloody vomit comes out into the basin. It's kind of surreal sitting with a basin of blood surrounded by medical professionals. At the same time I felt like the dog who peed on the rug.
It's decided that I need a TIPS A.S.A.P. :
"A TIPS procedure involves creating a pathway through the liver that connects the portal vein (the vein that carries blood from the digestive organs to the liver) to a hepatic vein (one of three veins that carry blood from the liver to the heart)."
Wednesday, November 18, 2015
Tubes
Today is the day I get tubes in me. Yay! First,9am, had to get my kidney checked so you can imagine where that tube went. Owie! Everything was fine there and what an amazing journey with the camera.
Now I'm waiting for my bed at Farr 10 so I can get a feed tube put in me. And man man do I need it! Not looking forward to a tube going up my nose and into my stomach but what are you gonna do?
Hopefully I've been put on the donor as I think my case was up for review yesterday. Though I have my fingers crossed that my liver is healing itself and I won't need one. That would be soooo much better.
Off topic couch potato recommendations:
Fallout 4. Amazing game and it takes place in Boston!
Netflix/ Ken Burns "Cancer : the Emperor of maladies.
Tuesday, November 10, 2015
Thinner
The I haven't weighed 98 pounds since I was in junior high. This is getting scary. I'm suppose not be on a high protein /high fatdiet and I'm having troubles with it. First of all I've never liked eating that kind of food. So to be told, "hey bud your should drink heavy cream ". Is a little hard. Not to mention this stupid medication I'm taking so I don't go crazy makes my gut fill up with gas that just hangs out like my abdomen is the trendiest bar in town. Then there's the sodium. This picture: 
Is about 2 1/3 liters of trapped fluid that collects around my stomach and bladder if I eat too much salt. (Which is 2grams) and I eat well below that. I posted this on Instagram with a hashy labeled ##selfbrew, and got a lot of homebrewers liking my photo. Gave my roommate and a cheap laugh😂.
Is about 2 1/3 liters of trapped fluid that collects around my stomach and bladder if I eat too much salt. (Which is 2grams) and I eat well below that. I posted this on Instagram with a hashy labeled ##selfbrew, and got a lot of homebrewers liking my photo. Gave my roommate and a cheap laugh😂. Some of you might know how much food sucks without it. I told the nurse, I guess I'm not eating meat anytime soon. " I think you're being a little dramatic." She said.
Am I ? She suggested Mrs Dash whom I assume was divorced. That got me miffed but I held my tongue and sighed. The average joe eats 6-8grams a day!). So these bloating issues make it hard to eat cause then I feel crampy and ill. I need a pill that gives me 500cals and 20g of protein...cause I need to gain a a brick of pig iron (25lbs) to be heathy. 25lbs!!!
Thursday, November 5, 2015
Surprise , it’s hepatic encephalopathy!
My doctor’s are amazing; however when it came to hepatic encephalopathy their explanations fell through the cracks.
“Hepatic encephalopathy is the loss of brain function that occurs when the liver is unable to remove toxins from the blood. “-U.S. National Library of Medicine
Yes, my girlfriend and I got burnt hard by this; which goes to show you need to aspire to know all the facts. At the time I was trusting and sat on my hands when it came to information gathering. Also having someone close at all times is very important when it comes to this illness.
Let me set the scene: It’s beach day and I was really looking forward to it. My toxin of choice….Ammonia. My special lady friend and I set out early to maximize the amount of radiation we can drown ourselves in on a Sunday. I started acting irrational which I vaguely remember and my girlfriend wants to take me into the hospital; which further infuriates me. At this point I’ve blackout, yet go on function on remote. I woke up -rather regained sanity on Tuesday with my hands tied to a hospital bed, a catheter, and some snake like device up inside me that deposing of waste. Eh? Panic.
Apparently I turned into a raving lunatic after I blacked out. My girlfriend called an ambulance because I’m sitting in the middle of the street in my neighborhood, making a huge scene. As soon as I’m in the ambulance they try to put tubes in my nose and I rip them out. This continues in the I.C.U. until they finally tie my hands to the bed. At this point my girlfriend tells me I was speaking mostly in fragmented words and code. Yeah code. Turns out my liver deposes of ammonia and my brain became flooded with it. Might have been nice to mention that Doc.
Ironically a few months before I was complaining about an acquaintance I had at my local rock gym; who was a sweet guy but always smelled liked cat piss. I looked it up finally and it turns out that some people who have too much protein in their diet sweat out ammonia….hence cat piss.
“Hepatic encephalopathy is the loss of brain function that occurs when the liver is unable to remove toxins from the blood. “-U.S. National Library of Medicine
Yes, my girlfriend and I got burnt hard by this; which goes to show you need to aspire to know all the facts. At the time I was trusting and sat on my hands when it came to information gathering. Also having someone close at all times is very important when it comes to this illness.
Let me set the scene: It’s beach day and I was really looking forward to it. My toxin of choice….Ammonia. My special lady friend and I set out early to maximize the amount of radiation we can drown ourselves in on a Sunday. I started acting irrational which I vaguely remember and my girlfriend wants to take me into the hospital; which further infuriates me. At this point I’ve blackout, yet go on function on remote. I woke up -rather regained sanity on Tuesday with my hands tied to a hospital bed, a catheter, and some snake like device up inside me that deposing of waste. Eh? Panic.
Apparently I turned into a raving lunatic after I blacked out. My girlfriend called an ambulance because I’m sitting in the middle of the street in my neighborhood, making a huge scene. As soon as I’m in the ambulance they try to put tubes in my nose and I rip them out. This continues in the I.C.U. until they finally tie my hands to the bed. At this point my girlfriend tells me I was speaking mostly in fragmented words and code. Yeah code. Turns out my liver deposes of ammonia and my brain became flooded with it. Might have been nice to mention that Doc.
Ironically a few months before I was complaining about an acquaintance I had at my local rock gym; who was a sweet guy but always smelled liked cat piss. I looked it up finally and it turns out that some people who have too much protein in their diet sweat out ammonia….hence cat piss.
Tuesday, November 3, 2015
If you've had a blood transfusion before the year 1992, GET TESTED.
First and foremost for the beginning of this blog I want to reach out to all the people out there who are suffering from this horrible disease that can cause a myriad of health problems. Hepatitis C. Some get it from sharing needles but there is a vast number of victims that got from blood transfusions that where not screened.
"Before 1992, people could get hepatitis C through blood transfusions and organ transplants. Since 1992, all donated blood and organs are screened for hepatitis C, so it is now rare to get the virus this way." - WebMD (http://www.webmd.com/hepatitis/hepc-guide/hepatitis-c-cause)
Though there is no empirical evidence-knowing the nature of Hep C , can lie dormant in someone for years. I received more than a few transfusions when I was two - three back in 1977. Then around the age of 38 , mixed with the average of two beers a night after work....severely damaged my liver before I even know I had this disease. So if you've had a blood transfusion before the year 1992, GET TESTED.
So far these are some of the problems that have arisen from this disease; before and after being cured of it.
-anemia
-thrush
-vomiting blood
-kidney infection
-cirrhosis
-rash
-bloated stomach
-severe loss of weight
-weakness
-chills
-diarrhea
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